She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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