then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Randomize
