flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
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