he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
She's the barista slut.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
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