I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Randomize
