No awkward lesbian experiences without me
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
