hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize