I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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