then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
She bit a glass in half.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
I want to be your penis for a week.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
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