dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
Randomize
