Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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