Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
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