They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
