Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Randomize