You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
