He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Randomize
