what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Randomize
