My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
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