I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
