Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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