Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Randomize
