I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
