I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Randomize
