Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
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