called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
