ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
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