What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
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