seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize
