You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Randomize
