none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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