I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
i think i have herpe
just one?
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
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