You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
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