he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
