I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
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