I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
Dude I just picked up a married chick while her husband was playing pool.
What do you mean you picked her up? How are you gonna leave the bar?
I didn't. I fucked her in the men's room. Come get me before he finds out.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
We talked him into tasing himself.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Randomize
