There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Randomize
