Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Randomize
