When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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