I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize
