You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Randomize
