you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
You are a genius and a whore.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize