called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
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