Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
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