apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
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