wrigley field is MILF paradise
Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
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