Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize
