but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
Randomize