id be glad to
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
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