His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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