is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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